Hello! This weekend we had #TalkMH meet up in London. I don’t really know where to start
I guess I feel kind of mixed. I feel extremely happy to have met such wonderful people, but I also feel a bit sad, too. I feel a bit sad that I couldn’t give everybody what I feel they deserve.
Don’t get me wrong, it was a great day. Meeting everybody and talking to them in real life and seeing them in the flesh was amazing. We talked about all sorts of stuff whether it be mental health related or not, ate, drank, hugged, photographed. And it didn’t rain.
I put a lot of pressure on myself for starters, to get people aware of the event; to want to come; to come, but then they actually did. They came. They travelled from far and wide – from abroad, even – and I guess I just feel guilty that I don’t know how to express my gratitude. I think that’s what it is. I don’t know how to show my appreciation.
Of course, you say it. I have said it. To individuals, to the group, online. But what does it really mean? I wish I could provide everybody with what they really need. Maybe that’s just what comes with writing about mental health: I want to help people in ways that I can’t.
But for what it’s worth, to everyone who came and saw us on Saturday; to those who travelled for hours; to those who were anxious and worried; to those who felt they couldn’t do it; to those who felt they weren’t worth it; to those who felt like it was a bit of a let down; to those who loved it. Every single person has had a massive affect on me and my life. Every single person has provided me – and each other – with something different. I am grateful to every person who came. Sounds a bit silly, doesn’t it? Ah yay thanks for coming to see me! But that’s not what it is. It’s far more than that. I understand the feeling of being terrified of travel, of people, of social events, of being left out. Every single person overcame something to be there. I literally can’t express my gratitude. Maybe I’m just in one of those moods or a bit overwhelmed maybe but, I just want to give thanks.