#TalkMH Meet | A Post on Gratitude

Hello! This weekend we had #TalkMH meet up in London. I don’t really know where to start

I guess I feel kind of mixed. I feel extremely happy to have met such wonderful people, but I also feel a bit sad, too. I feel a bit sad that I couldn’t give everybody what I feel they deserve.

Don’t get me wrong, it was a great day. Meeting everybody and talking to them in real life and seeing them in the flesh was amazing. We talked about all sorts of stuff whether it be mental health related or not, ate, drank, hugged, photographed. And it didn’t rain.

I put a lot of pressure on myself for starters, to get people aware of the event; to want to come; to come, but then they actually did. They came. They travelled from far and wide – from abroad, even – and I guess I just feel guilty that I don’t know how to express my gratitude. I think that’s what it is. I don’t know how to show my appreciation.

Of course, you say it. I have said it. To individuals, to the group, online. But what does it really mean? I wish I could provide everybody with what they really need. Maybe that’s just what comes with writing about mental health: I want to help people in ways that I can’t.

But for what it’s worth, to everyone who came and saw us on Saturday; to those who travelled for hours; to those who were anxious and worried; to those who felt they couldn’t do it; to those who felt they weren’t worth it; to those who felt like it was a bit of a let down; to those who loved it. Every single person has had a massive affect on me and my life. Every single person has provided me – and each other – with something different. I am grateful to every person who came. Sounds a bit silly, doesn’t it? Ah yay thanks for coming to see me! But that’s not what it is. It’s far more than that. I understand the feeling of being terrified of travel, of people, of social events, of being left out. Every single person overcame something to be there. I literally can’t express my gratitude. Maybe I’m just in one of those moods or a bit overwhelmed maybe but, I just want to give thanks.


Thank you.

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4 Comments

  1. April 23, 2017 / 10:35 pm

    It was a great day Hannah! I was going to write a blog post myself but I haven’t quite found the right words yet. I have so much gratitude and respect for you for creating #talkmh and a community so amazing and supportive.

    On the way there, I was plagued by questions like ‘ What if Its too much for me?’ ‘What if I panic and embarrass myself?’ ‘What if I can’t think of anything to say?’ ‘What if no one likes me?’ Etc. And yeah I’m still paranoid about that last one. But I’m so proud of myself for going and I’m proud of every other person who did too, including you, and for facing their individual challenges. Try not to feel sad, you’ve done so much and owe us nothing to show your appreciation. We feel it! I was going to suggest maybe dropping a little personal DM to everyone that went, but tbh you don’t need too. We all know how you feel and we feel the same.

    Thank YOU, and hopefully I’ll see you at another meet soon! Xx

    Meg
    bekindtoyourmind.org

  2. April 23, 2017 / 11:15 pm

    I didn’t come, but I feel I need to comment, because in other circumstances I would have made the effort, despite of crippling social phobia, travel anxieties and other factors. I’ll tell you why : because you created a wonderfully supportive community to which I am ever grateful and this is possible specifically because you’re such a good and supportive person yourself.

    Your leadership in this community is an example of courage and generosity of spirit that I have admired about you for quite some time, although most probably far shorter than almost anyone else that you have already known here. I think the mere fact that 23 people decided to be brave and try this meetup is a proof that we all in this community follow your example and that we appreciate your company.

    The day I do come, it’ll mean that I must leave my home the previous day, because it’d take a good 18 hours of travel. That day will come, it must. Not only as a personal (massive) challenge, but as a human experience.

    I want to meet you Hannah, I want to thank you in person for the tremendous impact you had in my life. Through talkmh, I have found people who care about me and support me, just as much as they/you support one another.

    We confided in one another and I would make this effort to meet you and anyone else I have come to appreciate like I feel towards you, as I consider you a friend – though off course, we’re still learning about one another.

    Everyone who came seems to not only have enjoyed the day, but pushed their boundaries and won something over one or several personal battles. That says a lot about you!

    I do understand the sadness and your feelings are valid, off course. I do agree with Meg 100%, I’m sure everyone knows because certain human dialogues are unsaid ; they transcend words, and they are felt, right in our “heart-shaped” brain portion that is about our feelings and emotions (talking metaphors as I’m not a brain scientist).

    I hope your sadness will diminish and your happiness grow, in time. Big big hugs Hannah, you truly are a wonderful friend

  3. April 24, 2017 / 7:25 am

    Don’t beat yourself up for not being “grateful enough”! I think your empathy in this post says it all. You’re wonderful for organising the chat in the first place. You’ve given us a safe space to talk about mental health and that’s important. I’m grateful for YOU and all your efforts and I know everyone else who’s a part of #TalkMH is too. I hope everyone had a great time at the meet and I’m gutted I couldn’t make it!

  4. April 28, 2017 / 4:50 pm

    It looks like a great day! I hope i can feel brave enough to come to the next one and never feel guilty you have supported so many people

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