Therapy for Anxiety #3

*You can catch up on the first two posts here*

Tonight I had my third therapy session. If you’re up to date on this little series you’ll already be aware that I’ve started EMDR therapy to hopefully deal with my anxiety triggers. Tonight’s session was a little different in that we didn’t focus on past traumas as originally planned, we focused on something else that’s affecting me currently.

You’re probably going to laugh.

On Friday I have a blood test. I think it’s pretty safe to say that nobody likes blood tests and most people find them uncomfortable. Blood tests terrify me. Past experience has indicated that sometimes my body doesn’t react well – possibly due to iron deficiency, that’s what they’re checking again – and often I faint or vomit. So here I am the week before my appointment struggling with anxiety yet again about the fact that I have a blood test on Friday. Instead of cancelling or trying to avoid thinking about it altogether – I’m really bad for this, I don’t recommend it – my therapist said that we’d work on it tonight to hopefully make my experience on Friday more bareable.

One of the main anxiety triggers for me is the feeling of simply not being able to cope. This became very apparent for me whilst in the depths of depression and every time I get that familiar feeling of shit, I really can’t do this, anxiety becomes a real problem for me. Do you ever get that feeling of being so worried about something or scared of it that you feel like you genuinely can’t do it? This is how I feel about blood tests.

So we worked on it. My therapist moved her hands and my eyes followed – stopping in places to see what I was experiencing, thinking, feeling – and it was quite odd but, again, interesting. My brain made connections between events and occasions of past blood tests, other medical experiences and general bits and bobs. My body felt hot, twitchy, my thoughts negative, then positive.

But did it work? At the moment I feel fine – exhausted, but fine – I’m yet to find out. I’ll find out on Friday and let you know in next week’s therapy update. Wish me luck!

 

P.S. This post may make no sense and be full of rambly junk but please forgive me – this therapy process is quite exhausting for not only my eyes, but my whole mind and body. Bear with.

Share:

3 Comments

  1. October 14, 2016 / 9:53 am

    I was exactly the same when I had my blood test to rule out any underlying issues. Apart from a Vit D deficiency I’m all good. I’m so pleased you’re finding these sessions helpful, its so nice to read 🙂 x
    http://www.elliswoolley.blogspot.com

  2. October 17, 2016 / 7:48 pm

    I’ve been getting that feeling a lot recently, and it really scares me! I totally understand that genuine feeling of pure panic where you don’t know what to do because you feel like you can’t really cope or face whatever you’re anxious about. It sounds like your therapy is going well and I’m so glad, I find it really helps me too – but never tried this form so maybe it’s worth a go some day!

    Huge Good Luck for Friday, hope the therapy continues to go well and that you feel OK when the time comes! *Thinking of you beautiful!*

    Josie //JosieVictoriaa // Travel, Fashion & Lifestyle

  3. October 18, 2016 / 11:49 pm

    Hi ,

    I just found your blog and have been reading your posts with your anxiety therapy. I’m so glad it seems to be going well for you. I can really relate on some level to how you feel and found your journey so far with the therapy really interesting. Look forward to reading more about it ☺️ And also the rest of your blog! xxx

Leave a Reply